Fer cause then you might marry a goat!!!

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where is the controversy?

I went to my senior ball with my best friend. She is a girl. I am a girl. We are girls. No one said a thing about us going to our senior ball together. Not the teachers, not the students, not our mothers. No one. Maybe because we both wore dresses? I don’t think anyone thought we were gay, and I don’t think it would have occurred to us to be offended if they had. We both had many gay friends so being included in that clique was pretty normal for us anyway. We went together because 1: we were best friends, 2: I was living in Texas at the time just home visiting, and 3: her live in boyfriend had just moved to South Carolina. Really, if you don’t have a partner, who better to do something special with than your best friend? 

We both wore black cocktail dresses and we had our pictures taken by the professional photographer. I think we probably even danced together. No one shut down the ball or kicked us out or condemned us to hell for having fun. That was 1991. Now, in the year 2010, a girl was not allowed to bring her girlfriend to her senior ball. I don’t get it. I mean, I do. I hear bigoted, ignorant, people who try really hard to force others to conform to their rigid ideas of humanness. I know they exist and I know they hold positions of power in society. What I do not understand is what exactly were they trying to accomplish by canceling the entire senior ball and blaming it on this girl who wanted to go with her girlfriend? Maybe they thought all the kids would hate her and attack her like some scene out of Carrie? How sick are these freaks who “run” the school, state, country? 

I watched a few interviews with the girl who was at the center of the controversy. It really didn’t seem like she was asking for anything. She just wanted to go to her senior ball with someone she liked. And, of course, the students would blame her for the cancellation of her prom…cause they are kids, without fully developed frontal lobes, so, they are not fully rational humans yet. Unlike the school officials, who decided it would be a good idea to ruin every kid’s prom experience because one kid wanted to bring a girl as a date and wear pants. Cause those school officials have fully developed frontal lobes and well, ok, maybe they don’t. 

It isn’t suprising but it is sad. I don’t ever remember caring if someone was gay or straight as a kid. It was just a non issue for me. I mean, for my gay friends it was an issue, I don’t discount that they went through their own private hell in coming out. But when they did come out, it certainly didn’t make me love them any less or change my view of them. They are beautiful people no matter who they hold hands with. To be honest, I don’t want to think of anyone having sex….not straight people or gay people or people I know or people I don’t know. Other people’s sex lives do not interest me. Why do they interest government officials? Because God told them to be interested? Ok, but we have separation of church and state so if God is talking to the elected officials then they should pick a new profession such as priest where it is perfectly ok to think about kids having sex. 

I do not understand who these officials think they are saving or helping. I do not understand why it is ok to discriminate. Since when, in America, the country that fights wars for peoples civil liberties, is it ok to make laws against an entire population? I know we have a long history of doing this. To African-Americans, to women, to Japanese, to Irish, to kids. We have blemish marks on our record as a country that is all for human rights. But we learned from our mistakes, right? Now we know better, therefore we DO better, right? 

Not yet. Apparently we are still screwing up. I can only imagine how ashamed we will feel in the future(not that many of us don’t already feel ashamed) when we look back and have to teach the early 21st century history which will include bans against same-sex marriage or gay adoptions. We will feel the shame. The same shame that we feel today when we teach about slavery and discrimination against women or against black people and white people marrying or child labor. It was wrong, we learned our lesson, we will not do it again. 

Except for the gays…they can’t get married. Cause that would be wrong? Gross? The beginning of the end of our society? Because gay people are LESS than straight people. That must be it. They don’t count. Gay marriage will hurt US!! In fact, they really don’t deserve any rights what so ever!! Not to vote or attend school or ride the bus. Oh now come on! That is taking it too far!! Just not to get married and we should make it really hard for them to adopt. After all, if the gays adopt all the kids, they could start a gay army and then take over all of us straight people and make us gay!! 

Gay isn’t contagious. You can’t catch it or “make” someone gay. I don’t get the discrimination at all. I can kind of understand the warped mentality of discrimination against women….we look different from men. Or blacks….they are a different color. Or kids….they are smaller than grown ups. But gay people? Gay people look exactly like all of the other minorities” we” have already decided to accept. How can we justify withholding basic human rights from a human being

But we do. And some of us yell and scream about it and some of us quietly protest. There are some of us who will love and accept our gay friends but when it comes down to it they will deny them, just like Peter denied Jesus when confronted. Why? How can anyone possibly believe that it is ok to discriminate. We are in the 21st century in a country that was founded on the idea that we should be free. I won’t argue with you, try to change your mind. But I know, from personal experience, that gay people live and love just exactly like you do and they make great parents and they have healthy, long-lasting relationships. I wish the powers that be could have had my upbringing because if they had they would have no fear and they would do what is right and good. 

But they didn’t. Although there has to come a day when we get over the tainted messages we were given as children and become adults who can incorporate the ideas and philosophies other than the outdated ones that parents, church or bigoted peers taught us. Just cause my great great grandma said it doesn’t mean I have to live my life by it. 

Today, my best friend and I are looking forward to our 20th high school reunion. She is married with 3 kids, I am divorced with 3 kids and we will go together. I said that everyone will think we really were a couple back then, and that we still are. And they will think that her husband is just our baby maker. We laughed at that idea. Who cares? I mean really, if you have time to worry about who your next door neighbor is doing then you have far too much time on your hands. Get some Pride.

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About sparklingbytheway

I am a single mother to three girls. I live in a very small village and I teach dance in another very small village that is on the oppisite side of the medium sized city. This blog is about my life, past, present and future. My opinions, my thoughts, my ideas. I love to read other people's experience, strength and hope and so now I will share a little bit of my own. I love to laugh and make others laugh. I swear and I can't spell for shit but I never intend to offend!!!

3 responses »

  1. Excellent post – I cannot believe that prom was cancelled! Funny how some progressive nations can have such backward thinking (not that the people in that nation do). Here in SA the government has more progressive thinking (eg gay people can marry) but it fails to take care of some of the basics.

    So sad to hear about the girls’ plight though.

  2. i’m just glad i found your blog. thank you from someone who has been with her partner for 25 years and is as married as you can get. thank you for pointing out we are just like everyone else. just thank you.

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