Tag Archives: fine

Dear Diary, What A Day

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It was Boob Squish Day. That was all good until they found something and wanted to do the Elevator Door Squish and the Magnified Squish. Holy SMACK that was actually painful! Regular mammogram squish isn’t too bad…the mammo-lady told me a few years ago that I was very lucky to have such thin breasts…Not that I put that on my dating profile or anything but I’m secretly proud of my thin breasts…I nursed 3 babies exclusively for a total of 54 months and The Girls still look good when I fold them up and stuff them in an underwire (only on special occasions). So, yeah, they found something. They tell you that and then send you back out to wait in the waiting room.

I was pretty surprised because I have been having pain in the left one, but they saw something in the right one…I was sort of hoping it was money. Guess not. So they say I have to have a sonogram. They put me in the sono room and the tech and I chat about my finger and how mandolins should be outlawed. Then I said “Is it a boy or girl?” and she sort of looked at me funny. Sonograms are not nearly as fun when there is no baby…

She left to go check with the doctor. She came back and said it’s nothing really. So I hugged her and thanked her and well…that was awkward….Another lady in the waiting room was being all pissy because she had been waiting so long. She was throwing a bit of attitude. So, as I was leaving the mammo-lady made it a point to say “and thank you so much for your patience!!!” *sigh* the pissy lady was probably just scared. Sometimes I cry when I get scared. Sometimes I hug random sono techs. We all deal with fear differently.

From there I went to a whole other county to get my missing chunk finger looked. I can’t look at it so someone else has to look at it. Just to make sure it is still there and all. Yup. Still there! Still hurts!

But the best part of today, besides having my boobs squish session turn out ok and having my missing chunk finger looker atter say that my missing chunk finger is healing nicely, was having my shower finally fixed! Yea!!! We are back to being normal bathroom people! We no longer have to pack up our stuff and walk four houses down to our friend’s house to pee or shower! So, today was a good day. I could get all deep and say really wise and prophetic things about life and death and grief and fear…instead I will show you pictures of my adventures…

Boob Squish Day Selfie! All the kids are doin it!!! Check out my missing chunk finger bandage and my fake Chucks from Hills circa 1994....

Boob Squish Day Selfie! All the kids are doin it!!! Check out my missing chunk finger bandage and my fake Chucks from Hills circa 1994….

That's my boob. No money in there and no babies....not very fun if you ask me...

That’s my boob. No money in there and no babies….not very fun if you ask me…

Um, if they have xray glasses, why do we need to have our boobs squished? Just put on the glasses and check...duh.

Um, if they have xray glasses, why do we need to have our boobs squished? Just put on the glasses and check…duh.

Pretty sure that is an atari...maybe I want to be a sonogram tech when I grow up...they get xray glasses and atari???

Pretty sure that is an atari…maybe I want to be a sonogram tech when I grow up…they get xray glasses and atari???

That is my missing chunk finger without the bandage. Don't tell me what it looks like...I don't want to know. Just the thought of it grosses me out. But I thought YOU guys might like to see...

That is my missing chunk finger without the bandage. Don’t tell me what it looks like…I don’t want to know. Just the thought of it grosses me out. But I thought YOU guys might like to see…

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