Tag Archives: nonsense

Dear Diary, Whata Year

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Peace Out Bitches

Peace Out Bitches

I am older, wiser, fatter, smarter, greyer, squishier, and alot of other “er” things. I am still a dancer despite my best attempts at working a “regular” job. I left dance like it was a lover who cheated but dance refused to let me go. Isn’t that all sorts of romantic? It has to be because that is all the romance you are gonna get from me tonight.

2014 brought about many changes which is sort of to be expected when you are a mother. Kids grow and change thereby forcing their parents to grow and change. That’s some deep shit right there…

I put some thought into what my life is going to look like in the coming years and it freaked me right the fuck out so, I made a conscious decision to STOP thinking about my future. I’ll either wind up living under a bridge or meet a kazillionaire who will fund my retirement.

I lost some and gained some. Life changed. I was sick and well. I am surprised at how fast this year went. I realized this when I thought about calling and making an appointment to get my taxes done. I only see this guy once a year but it seems like the time between seeing him is getting smaller. It isn’t, it is just me thinking it is. Cause I’m old now.

Haven’t found my birth parents yet. Haven’t received my medical licence yet. Haven’t driven to California yet. I’m curious to see if any of those things happen in the coming year.

Love you guys!!! Have a great year!!!

And to all a good night...

And to all a good night…

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Dear Diary, It’s Been Awhile…

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My mom was in a biker gang when she was young. She is still pretty bad ass.

My mom was in a biker gang when she was young. She is still pretty bad ass.

So…how’s it going? Me? Not much is new here. We had Easter. That was nice. I like Easter. I used to dress up the kids in identical dresses every year which was challenging as they are 4 years apart. When my oldest was 11, she started rolling her eyes when I would come home with the matching dresses. My dad actually put his arm around her shoulder on the last Easter he was alive and said “Really, I think it’s time you stopped forcing them to dress alike…they aren’t triplets, they aren’t going to be triplets. Just because they are sisters doesn’t mean they need to match on major holidays.”  And then he died. Well, not right at that moment…that would have been REALLY traumatic and maybe if that had happened I would have taken his words to heart. Instead, I continue to find matching outfits. But not matching exactly. For Christmas, we all wore knit dresses in solid colors. For Easter, we all wore dresses with crochet overlay…yes, I said WE…I have included myself in the dress alike nonsense since I have become single. Judge not lest ye be judged…

We saw some movies. We cleaned the basement. We are painting my youngest kid’s bedroom. It is spring break here.

That’s all.

TTYL.

This is what we do while waiting for church to start...reverence..we got it.

This is what we do while waiting for church to start…reverence..we got it.

Dear Diary…Day Two

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This is Eddie. He is contemplating why anyone would willing get out of bed...ever.

This is Eddie. He is contemplating why anyone would willing get out of bed…ever.

Well, look at me!!! Here it is day TWO and I am writing again! I am mildly impressed with myself. Mostly because I know me and I was really unsure that this was going to be happening!

Ok, today the kids went back to school after ALMOST two whole weeks off. Almost two whole weeks but two days short (because school is dumb). Last night the weather was getting a bit snotty. The weathermen were doing their predicting and we were sleeping with our PJs inside out, had our undies in the freezer and  we went outside, spun 3 times while singing the alphabet backwards. Ok, we didn’t do any of that. But, maybe if we had, they would have had a snow day today. They didn’t.But the school district I work in did and so did the school district where I grew up. Both of THOSE districts NEVER close. But they did today!!! Unfortunately, no one told my neighbor who works in the high school I went to as a kid and he drove himself all the way to work…on a SNOW DAY! Poor guy.

Up at the asscrack of dawn to get these kids awake and functioning. Off to school they go.

I almost died twice getting them to school. And some dink of a teenager also came close to death, although I am sure he doesn’t even know it because he had his hoodie up and just kept walking while I slid within inches of his Timberlands. Teenagers are sort of dumb. I say that because I was a teenager and I was plenty dumb. I guess I am just shocked they haven’t gotten any smarter in the years since.

Went to the bagel shop with my dog. Went in and the little old lady who is there every other day was there and said the same thing she says every time “Oh!!! Your little doggie loves you so!!!” and my standard reply “He’s a good boy”. My life, as you will soon recognise, is like Groundhogs Day. And I’m ok with that. Went to Starbucks for my iced green tea. I wish I could drink hot liquids as it was a chilly 10 degrees this morning but, I can’t. I walked in, no line, didn’t have to speak and my order was ready. Got back in the car with my dog and drove 20 mph home. The roads were nasty.

Cleaned the kid’s rooms, did the laundry, smashed my head on the cellar door so hard I saw stars…ya know, just for something fun to do.

Went to the bank. The teller was my old friend, she gave the dog a bisquet. Went to the next bank. The teller was not my old friend. Dog did not get a bisquet. He was very confused. Came home. Sat down for about a half an hour. Went to get the kids from school.

Collected the children. Went to the laundromat to dry all of the wet clothes as we do not, as of yet, have a dryer hooked up…I say “as of yet” because it makes it sound like we will have one hooked up shortly. We won’t, but it sounds like we will.

Made the kids run into the grocery as I hadn’t showered yet. I sat in the car and texted them what we needed for dinner. After about the 4th text, my 15 year old asked if we could just get McDonald’s. As tempting as that sounded I said no. I got alot of ugly stares as I was parked in the fire lane. Oh well, to bad so sad. I got here first. And I know a fireman so I am pretty sure it’s ok.

They came out. We went home.

I started dinner. My 10 year old took the dog out for a pee and switched the dishes (from the dishwasher to the cupboards, from the sink to the dishwasher) My 15 year old shoveled out the end of the driveway where the village plows had plowed us in. She did it with a smile on her face. A fifteen year old smile. Have you seen that sort of smile? It looks exactly like an adult’s I-Hate-My-Life-And-Wish-Everyone-Would-Drop-Dead smile but in a 15 year old way.

The 15 year old and I went to gather the dry laundry at the laundromat and bring it up to my room where I sorted it into our rooms and put away my 10 year old’s. I left the 15 year old’s in the basket in her room. So that she can throw it all over her floor and mix it up with some damp towels and dog hair so they all smell funny. I guess that is the new fad?

We ate dinner. Stuffed pork chops, green beans and garlic mashed potatoes. All the 10 year old ate was the green beans, all I ate was the stuffing and the 15 year old finished off the potatoes. I don’t know why I even bother.

It’s dropping to below zero tonight. The governor has declared a state of emergency or something and is shutting down all the highways as of midnight. I guess this is a bad storm. I didn’t have to go to work tonight because the weather is so bad. I love a snow day! I told the kids they will more than likely not have school tomorrow. The 10 year old did a happy dance. The 15 year old gave me her “smile”.

Nothing else planned for tonight except giving each other mani pedi’s and yelling at the dog to leave the cat alone.

I know all the words to the Humpty Dance.

The Uncle from Fresh Prince of Bel Air died.

Maybe I will see you tomorrow!!!!

The 14 year old smile(before she was 15. Now she has it mastered)...and the 10 year old's creepy smile...

The 14 year old smile(before she was 15. Now she has it mastered)…and the 10 year old’s creepy smile…